I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs! I feel like I’m delaying the inevitable, I see people everywhere with someone and ask myself, why not? What is it about me that repulses any female into putting me in this unwanted friend zone, I have enough friends. I feel trapped and useless, unwanted and neglected. This is depression at its worse. ‘FUCK!’
So just this past week was very stressful.
We had this bared out drunken bitch “Try” to steal an iPhone and some medication from my best friend B, We caught her and i saw her tossing the pills. She denied the Stealing of the iPhone and even went to an extent to “Try” and blackmail us, she told B that she would call DCF and she told me that she would call my manager and tell him about the fake doctors note and she would give him the website. I told this bitch to do it and i even told her that i would give her my managers number, She didnt have anything to say, so i went on facebook and started talking about it and some dumb cunt decided to get involved and her name is Caitlyn Garber, she was like we had it coming to us and shit and basically talking shit, she posted a picture of Jordan Bryant’s cross and the caption was just listening to county music with JB, i commented on it and told her to get over it. Apparently thats disrespecting Jordan, but i told JUST HER to get over it, we get it, he passed away, not every post and picture has to be about him, just how you TROLL on my shit i can return the favor and look like the bad guy, everyone is threatening me saying “youre gonna appriciate that ass whoopin”, yeah that doesnt scare me, not at all. Theres this main one that said i better grow eyes in the back of my head or else everyone in polk is gonna beat my ass. Yeah. First this guy is like 24 years old and still attends all high school events, all the parties and pretty much does everything that teenagers do. Sir, you can go fuck yourself. Stephanie Michelle is a strung out bar head and she’s gonna Appreciate that ass whoopin’, and as for me, im ready for anything and anyone. Moral of this was, dont troll on someone if you cant handle what they have to say.
So today i took care of Bee’s baby, i had to wake up at 6am!
So anyways, i got up and got dressed and was on my merryFUCKINGway until i went to Dunkin’ Donuts and they gave me a nasty ice coffee, i baked and chilled with Kaleb and watched Breaking Dawn, best movie ever. Then i picked Bee up from worked and smoked once again, and then went to Waffle House and ate the regular hashbrowns.
We went to Ashley’s house and chilled there and we took a small nap to regain our strength.Ha!
Then ended it smoking again and failing at making a gravity bong, so i made one out of a Dunkin’ Donuts ice coffee cup.
The hits were great!
I had a tumor.
They took it out.
& thats when the problems started…
This scar on the side of my face ruined everything for me.
I could of been living a crazy life filled with photo capturing moments, but no.
Instead, I live a sheltered life because im scared on what people might think, thus social anxiety, which means always being nervous…
The nerves kill me, i feel like my insides are being ripped out and my lungs filled with dust.
I can’t think, I drown in my own thoughts…
I feel like everyone’s older than me and much more mature.
& see myself as the child.
I would of never thought that i would know so many people having the anxiety that i have.
Shits crazy.
SideeeeNoteee, I found out that i need to either work six days a week, or work really hard in front of the bitchy managers so that they can tell GM to give me a fucking raise, because im not working 4 days a week.
